How Time Flies

I begin most mornings spending a few minutes with the TimeHop app. I enjoy looking over my posts on various social media sites and reflecting on things for a moment. Today's reflection centered on the past two years.

This time last year, I was in the early stage of my first semester at Wayland. What was my major struggle? I was dealing with self doubt as I fought my way through an open score. Now, there are days that I WISH an open score was my greatest challenge!

It doesn't seem possible that two years ago my family was dealing with the news that Dad would have triple bypass in the days ahead and the prognosis was not promising. It's tough to think about how much that one event colored my life for months as we went through the surgery, struggled with post-op complications, and started the uncertain journey to recovery at home. Now that Dad is living a normal life again, the memories seem so distant. Still, without a doubt, I know that 2014 was a year that forever changed me and my family.

Now I wonder what the future has in store. All I know for certain is that God will be there with me and will continue to prove Himself faithful in every circumstance.

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Ready or Not....

Students are roaming the halls. A cacophony of sound fills the air again. Introductory lessons are being presented and lesson times are being scheduled. Private practice sessions and ensemble rehearsals are in full swing. That's right.....the fall semester of classes are finally underway in the School of Music at WBU.

Professors have been preparing for this moment for a few weeks. Faculty and student schedules alike are quickly becoming packed, but we wouldn't have it any other way. It's a privilege to get to do what we love -- make music! There's so much excitement and expectation in the air that you can feel the electricity.

I will stand before my first classes of the semester tomorrow morning. That means I get to ease into the new semester -- making last minute changes to my schedule, observing the new students, and reconnecting with those returning. The first day of school is always filled with so much potential. We don't know exactly what this school year has in store, but we're all excited to start riding this wave together. Now, let's just see what's going to happen.....

Hits and Misses (August 14-20)

Here's a look back at the week that was.....

HITS

• Students began arriving on the Plainview campus throughout the week. The first wave in my world arrived on Sunday afternoon as Band Camp began. That evening, I got to join the students for a night of bowling. I had a blast....and I actually managed to bowl better than I had anticipated. My back was a little sore the next morning, but it was definitely worth it.
• To add to the fun, I've gotten to share several meals with students and colleagues this week. What's even better? It was free food! I enjoyed the laughter and fellowship as everyone is getting ready for the start of classes in just a few days.
• The highlight of the week was a moment of affirmation that came to the music faculty during one of our meetings. I think we were all overwhelmed by the emotional expression of gratitude that we witnessed and were humbled to think that our efforts were making such an impact in the life of the student who shared his heart with us. Throughout the remainder of our meetings, we repeatedly referenced the testimony we had heard and drew strength from it. It was a moment in my professional life that I will never forget.

MISSES

• It has been a long week of meetings as I participated in professional development workshops. Thankfully I didn't have as many meetings as I did last year in new faculty orientation, but processing so much information in such a short span of time is quite tiring. The first soundings of the morning alarm clock wasn't a welcome addition either. It's just another sign that things will begin hopping again very soon.  As the weekend arrived, I was feeling the drain in my body and just did not feeling well at all. I'm hoping that a few days of rest will return me to normal once again.
• A case of miscommunication became evident early in the week. It was stressful as both parties tried to figure out what had happened and how we could resolve the situation without too much fallout. Things didn't turn out as either of us had expected, but God in His wisdom knew exactly what needed to happen. Not only was the issue created by the miscommunication resolved, but another need was met in the process! I didn't enjoy the uncomfortable situation at the beginning of the week, but I just had to smile in appreciation and worship as I watched circumstances get worked out for the good of everyone involved.
• I've been experiencing an abnormal number of leg cramps this week. I think it's because my water consumption was greatly reduced during all of the meetings.....and the lack of walking wasn't helping things either. Here's hoping that things begin to return to normal very quickly.

When Words Won't Come

The cursor flashes on the blank screen. I try to write a few words, but they aren't right. Backspace, backspace, backspace. I stare at the flashing dash as it taunts me to try again. I know I have something to say. I know that it is worth the effort. I just don't know how to start. Words simply won't come!

I have agreed to attempt a couple of writing projects that are larger than my everyday blogging. I have thought about the topics. I have formed my opinions. I have done the preliminary research. With a deadline looming and no clarity about where the writing will take me, I stare at the screen in fear. For some reason, I feel as though words that are actually typed carry weight and permanence. As soon as I acknowledge this false opinion, I go back to the "tried and true" method of writing. I grab a pen and a legal pad. Suddenly, words are pouring onto the page and the writing process doesn't seem as intimidating.

I can't explain why, but I find something comforting about literally putting pen to paper. I suddenly give myself permission to write in disconnected fragments. What surprises me the most about the process is how my mind quickly organizes the chaos in the act of writing by hand. Connections I was not previously aware of begin to be illuminated and the pieces of the puzzle begin to fall into place. 

It's been a long time since I have struggled to this degree with a writing assignment. I have to admit that I started with the project that was most interesting to me and that I knew would ultimately be successful. The one that remains has me intimidated. I'm not an authority on all aspects of this topic and that has me second-guessing myself. Add to that the stress that the paper is of more of a formal nature and you can begin to understand that procrastination is hard at work. So I suppose it's time to find some quiet time in the office this weekend when no one is around and just begin to spill my thoughts onto my legal pad and see what comes out. I'm hoping to be surprised at the final product.

Laughing at Yourself

Momma said there would be days like this. Days when nothing seems to go quite right no matter what you do. Days when you are not sure if you should just crawl back in bed and try coming out with the next sunrise or simply cower in a far away corner while you wave the white flag of surrender. On these days, you can either choose to cry or learn to laugh at yourself.  I've cried enough over the years. I'm finally learning to laugh again....and it feels great!

Laughing at myself and at the absurdity of certain situations helps me to remember just how insignificant some things truly are. Laughing helps me to look for joy even in what feels like the worst of times. It helps me to admit the part I play in the frustrating situation and helps me stay humble. Most of all, laughing at myself reduces stress before it can become overwhelming and helps those around me feel more comfortable as well. That sounds like a win-win situation to me!

Clear out the grey clouds that are trying to loom over your day and simply chuckle. After all, things can't always go wrong....and if they do, you'll still be able to find something to smile about.

Hits and Misses (August 7-13)

Here's a look back at the week that was...

HITS

• It was wonderful to find myself back at College Heights this week. While I enjoyed worshipping with friends at home over the summer, it was great to be back with my church family. On Tuesday, the blessings continued as I joined the senior adults for their monthly luncheon. I enjoyed laughing and talking with them before I had the honor of sharing some music with them. I wasn't exactly sure what kind of program was expected, but I went with my gut and asked God to use my playing to touch their lives. What a sweet few minutes we were able to spend together in the fellowship hall worshipping our Lord. I truly hope to be able to play for these precious people again in the future.
• Back and hip problems plagued me over the weekend, so I went in search of a chiropractor on Monday morning. I was pleased to get worked in at West Texas Clinic of Chiropractic and quickly became comfortable with Dr. Nate Pochucha. I was thankful to find a doctor who was knowledgeable, personable, and that took the time to listen to my concerns and issues. It looks as though I will be seeing Dr. Nate quite a lot in the next few months to begin correcting some long-standing issues with my spine. I've already experienced some relief from my back pain and am very optimistic about things to come.
• Texting with my college apartment-mate is never dull. Tiff can make me laugh when no one else can. And she calls me out on things when needed as well. There was a flurry of text messages between Plainview and Honolulu this week....and I had a blast!
• It's been a rather peaceful week in the office. There aren't many students around and I've enjoyed the quiet because I've been able to get some things done in preparation for the semester's start. There's nothing better than being productive when the pace is slow and steady instead of frantic.
• I discovered a forgotten stash of gift certificates in my desk drawer this week. They couldn't have come at a better time either!

MISSES

• Financial stresses are never fun. Things have been tight all summer long after some unexpected expenses. I began paying Dr. Nate for chiropractic care this week just before learning that my insurance premiums were going up -- almost doubling, actually -- as a result of May's accident. Just when I thought I was going to be putting that nightmare behind me.....
• It's no secret that I eat in restaurants quite a bit. What can I say? It's easier to pay them and not have to deal with the preparation, clean up, and left overs! I intentionally try to visit places during their non-peak hours so the wait staff is not going crazy. This week, I experienced a new variation of that. While at Pizza Hut late on Wednesday night, I had to flag down wait staff to get any service at all. It wasn't that they were short handed either. There were probably more people on staff than diners at that moment. They just didn't bother to take care of anything! Frustrating!

Alone at Last!

The apartment is quiet. It's just me and the television on most days. That's quite a change from the hubbub of the Geriatric Ward for the past three months. It has taken some getting used to, but I think I'm finally getting used to the idea of being alone again....and actually coming to enjoy it.

I'm a self-proclaimed introvert. I don't mind being with people and can be a social person when necessary, but I do enjoy being by myself much of the time. I enjoy the quiet. It gives me time to think and to slow down from the normal hectic pace. I don't have to worry about anyone else's preferences or schedules. I can lie on the couch and watch anything I want on television...or I can click the boob tube off and curl up with my latest novel. It's much easier to close my eyes and meditate when no one else is going to traipse through the room. Dinner plans are never open for discussion; I can eat what I want when I want and no one else can possibly complain.

I will tell you that I wish my parents were here with me. I miss their laughter and energy -- most of the time. But for this season of my life, that's not what is in the cards for me, so I'll just continue to learn to be content in this situation and continue looking for things to enjoy about being alone at last.