I don't like confrontations. It's that simple. I really don't enjoy having difficult conversations with people regardless of whether I am the one being reprimanded or doing the correcting. With that being said, I much prefer a direct approach that brings the issue clearly to light than an around-the-world approach. Respect me enough to put issues out there clearly and I'll return the favor.

What brings this on? At the time of this writing, I have received three emails (all unrelated) addressing a variety of issues. One was calling me on the carpet for a situation; the others were expressing concern over situations that I am involved in (to lesser degrees, thankfully!).  The correctional email was actually a rather veiled threat that didn't name me specifically, but was clear given the examples included. Don't get me wrong....the reprimand is entirely warranted and a situation that I completely intend to rectify. It's just that now I have lost a lot of respect for the sender of said email. Rather than extending me the courtesy of just addressing the issue, I had to read between the lines and identify the problem.

Now that I've been sufficiently vague enough, managed to make it through the entire post without calling names, and started to find some humor in the situation that had me fuming when I sat down to write, I suppose it is now the appropriate time to end today's writing adventure.

PS - Normally this is the type of post that I would delete since it really doesn't address anything that will matter in the future (or to most of you reading this post). I'm going to depart from tradition and publish this amazing example of writing prowess. I'm sure I'll stumble across it again in a few years and rack my brain in a vain effort to recall what had me so worked up!  :)

Light at the End of the Tunnel

The end of the month is rapidly approaching and things are getting more busy with each passing day. Union University's Benjamin Britten Centennial Celebration will be held February 8-10. I am thrilled to be a part of the event, but things are getting hectic as the performance dates get closer. I suppose the best way to describe my feelings right now is with a picture.

There are days when I feel as though I have lots of responsibilities in the air and that I'm in control and keeping everything spinning. On other days, I watch something slip through the cracks and fear that everything is going to come crashing down around me. Thankfully, this intense season doesn't last for long.  When February 11 comes rolling around, expect to find me spending insane amounts of time in my bed, curled up under a blanket while I catch my breath.

Why does this happen? It's just the nature of my jobs. I have recurring responsibilities at each of the four positions. I've learned to balance them all fairly well and keep things running. Whenever one of them becomes more frantic -- whether it's due to the end of a production, the end of the term, a series of recitals, or a new ministry directive -- I have to shift things around to make everything work.  It keeps life interesting and allows me to participate in a lot of neat opportunities. It can also be a source of guilt when I feel as though I am short-changing some other area of my life.

So, for the next few weeks, I'd appreciate any extra prayers you want to offer for me. I've made arrangements to cover everything during the celebration and have made every effort to get out from behind the eight ball. If you see me looking frazzled, don't worry.  I'll be okay.....I'm just running around a little more than usual to keep all the plates spinning.  Things will return to their normal pace in a matter of weeks.

Is Faster Necessarily Better?

I have followed Oprah Winfrey for many years now. I always admired her willingness to tackle tough issues that some of her colleagues considered too hot to handle. When she created Oprah's Book Club, she started a sensation that got reluctant adult readers to explore the world of literature with new eyes. Now that her daily television show has ended, I was excited to see the Book Club re-invented as an online experience for book lovers.

One of my biggest personal complaints about reading is that I don't read as quickly as I would like. If a book is more than 250 pages, I can almost guarantee that it will take me longer than a week to get through it. When I received the latest email from Oprah's Book Club with an article entitled "6 Ways to Read Faster", I was intrigued. As I read on, I couldn't believe my eyes.

In a nutshell, "6 Ways to Read Faster" outlined the portions of a book to skip! Essentially, certain portions were considered unimportant, irrelevant, and a waste of time. I was mortified! As an artist, I find this idea insulting. The gifted craftsman who constructed the book carefully chose each word because of its significance and the imagery it generates.

Now the question becomes if speed (in reading or any other endeavor) is preferable to accuracy and integrity. In the world of reading, if the ideas presented on the page are not worth your full attention, I am certain that you can find something else that IS! Why would anyone want to waste their time reading material that is not applicable to them when shelves are lined with quality writing in all disciplines? I know that there are those of you who will argue that reading for pleasure doesn't demand the same type of attention as reading for knowledge. I respectfully disagree. In order to fully appreciate the tale the author is spinning, we must allow ourselves to be fully engulfed in the language and imagination that is being shared. Skipping portions is essentially taking a pair of scissors to the Mona Lisa and eliminating her famous smile because it is not significant!

I suppose I can come down from my soap box now....and dive back into the book I'm reading.

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What's in a Name?

I tend to avoid being in large groups with people I don't know. I enjoy meeting new people, but situations like these always result in embarrassment for me because I am absolutely HORRIBLE learning people's names. I hate feeling that I know a lot about a person but cannot remember what to call them. You can imagine how frustrating this is in work situations. I work for a church and need to know who people are; as a professor, calling a student by name communicates that I am interested in their progress and value them as an individual.

Our name shares with the world our identity. I was named after two ministers who were important in my parents' lives early in their faith journey -- Kennith Staggs and Terrell Bishop. While I rarely use my middle name, I am reminded of the role that faith has played in my life since the beginning. (It's a family joke that my name was originally going to be Barbara Beth since the doctors were expecting a little girl! Still, the influence of these two families were to be memorialized through my name.)

As we mature and develop, our names become synonymous with our reputation. Depending upon the circle where my name is mentioned, it may bring to mind thoughts of a gifted pianist, tough teacher, worship leader, or cherished fraternity brother. Those closest to me may also use nicknames for me -- terms of endearment (mostly) that are reminders of our shared connection. I take pride in most of my nicknames and laugh at the memories of how they came to be. While family members refer to me as "Kenbo" and "Uncle Ken", college friends will refer to me as "Ken-eye-eth" (spelled KennIth), "Kennith with an I" and "Grandma." So there's no mistake, there are also some not-so-complimentary nicknames as well; some of them (that I'm aware of, at least) include "Queen of Nag" and "Hitler." Despite the negative connotations, I still take a certain amount of pride in them.

As I continue to struggle to learn the names of my students this semester, I am reminded of how important it is that I know my own name as a child of God! My Heavenly Father calls me beloved.....more than a conqueror......redeemed......joint heir with Christ. How I long today to walk in a full understanding of who He says I am. I hope to live my life in a way that allows the name Kennith Freeman to invoke thoughts of compassion, kindness, and genuine love to those I meet. Along the way, I hope to develop deeper relationships with other people as we learn each other's names (no matter how slowly!) and develop a personal meaning for each other's name.

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."

On this national holiday celebrating the life and contribution of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., I had intended to remain silent on this blog. Raised in the South, I have learned of Dr. King's accomplishments and respected his commitment to equality for all. However, as a white man, I felt there was little I could add to the conversation.

Most of us are familiar with Dr. King's "I Have a Dream" speech delivered in Washington, D.C. It was in my minority literature class at Pepperdine University that I was first moved by what I consider an amazing piece of American letters:  Dr. King's Letter from a Birmingham Jail (1963).  While the letter is rather lengthy -- a fact King himself admits at the document's conclusion -- it is well worth the time to read. Dr. King clearly points out the reasoning for his involvement in the non-violent protests that have occurred throughout the South. The title of today's post is one of my favorite quotes from this letter that is made all the more amazing as we realize it was written without the aid of reference materials to develop Dr. King's argument. These arguments were part of the very fiber of his being.

Since I'm not confident that many reading this blog will invest the time to read this important letter (sorry....I'm just being honest!), allow me to point out a portion that occurs as Dr. King is approaching the climax of the letter.  While written in 1963, I think that it is something that the Christian community of 2013 would do well to consider.  Here are Dr. King's powerful words:

There was a time when the church was very powerful--in the time when the early Christians rejoiced at being deemed worthy to suffer for what they believed. In those days the church was not merely a thermometer that recorded the ideas and principles of popular opinion; it was a thermostat that transformed the mores of society. Whenever the early Christians entered a town, the people in power became disturbed and immediately sought to convict the Christians for being "disturbers of the peace" and "outside agitators."' But the Christians pressed on, in the conviction that they were "a colony of heaven," called to obey God rather than man. Small in number, they were big in commitment. They were too God-intoxicated to be "astronomically intimidated." By their effort and example they brought an end to such ancient evils as infanticide and gladiatorial contests. Things are different now. So often the contemporary church is a weak, ineffectual voice with an uncertain sound. So often it is an archdefender of the status quo. Far from being disturbed by the presence of the church, the power structure of the average community is consoled by the church's silent--and often even vocal--sanction of things as they are.

Powerful, profound, convicting words for us to consider as we think back over our nation's history while examining its current situation and praying for a better tomorrow.

A Rough Start......

I didn't think that getting keys to my classroom would be such a saga. I've been trying to obtain them for two days and still haven't had any success. It almost feels as though the "powers that be" are conspiring against me - LOL!

It all began Monday morning. My first class of the semester was scheduled to begin at 8am. I was expected to get keys last week at adjunct orientation (which is a total waste of time in my opinion since the content has been exactly the same for 6 semesters in a row), but was out of pocket due to a rehearsal I had previously committed to.  I didn't think it would be a big deal.....I showed up in the office at 7:30 to sign in for my keys. At 7:55, I finally had to ask a colleague to unlock the door to my classroom. The single person who can issue keys still had not arrived on campus by the end of my class.

My Tuesday class is in the evening. I realized that given the potential for ice and the fact that the lone authorized key agent was a day-time employee, I should probably head to campus to get the key. Before leaving my house at 10:30, I checked the college's website to make sure there was no announcement of plans to close early. I pull onto campus just before 11 and discover a ghost town, but the buildings are still unlocked. I go to the academic office to find the lights out and the doors sealed shut. As I return to my car, I learn that the campus was closed at 11am (the only way I knew what was going on was thanks to the plasma television -- educational funds hard at work -- flashing announcements).

Is it a big deal? Not really. Is it inconvenient?  Definitely. The beginning of a new semester is always inconvenient.....so that's nothing new. I understand why the keys are turned in at the end of each semester. Honestly, I'm really not upset.....it's just been a rough start to another semester (that I really haven't been looking forward to) and it seems as though nothing is going smoothly yet. I guess I've just been thrown off-kilter by the ragged schedule that will be interrupted again with the MLK holiday on Monday. I just need a stable routine.......then I won't be so cranky in a few days.

Now I think I'm going to crawl back in bed (at 6pm) and see if rolling out on the OTHER side will improve what's left of my day.  Happy Hump Day, y'all!

Control Freak Craziness!

Controlling people grate on my nerves.  You know the type I'm talking about.....their idea is the only valid option.....if things aren't done as they had envisioned, it will be trashed (or in the least trash-talked). In my world, I find myself working with "control freaks" on a regular basis. Even though it drives me crazy, I've learned to let it roll off of my back -- most of the time, anyway.

Knowing this, it should come as no surprise that this passage from The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky leapt off the page when I read it a few nights ago.

My sister tried to clarify things.  She said that by introducing me to all these great things, Mary Elizabeth gained a "superior position" that she wouldn't need if she was confident about herself.  She also said that people who try to control situations all the time are afraid that if they don't, nothing will work out the way they want.  (Chbosky, 106)

Isn't that interesting? Those who constantly pursue control are pursuing a "superior position" that is merely a perceived authority. It's not just a hunger for power; sometimes it can be an innate need to establish their own self-esteem. Perhaps that explains why so many artistic individuals are such controlling people. As we continuously create and allow the final product to be reviewed by our audience, a bit of our confidence dies with each negative review.

Did you notice that the controller is also constantly trying to introduce others to "great things." The assumption is that these ideas are brand new and could not have been conceived by anyone else. Perhaps a gentle reminder is in order here:  "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun."  (Ecclesiastes 1:9, NIV) I don't have anything else to say on that matter.

Finally, there is a fear of releasing their control. Controlling people are certain that things will not work out if they do not keep a firm grip on the situation...and all of the people involved in it. In my experience, controlling people find themselves shouldering heavy loads because they won't allow anyone else to help and because those who are willing to help quickly run for the hills when the control becomes too oppressive.

I didn't expect to find a leadership lesson hidden in the pages of The Perks of Being a Wallflower, but there it was. I definitely have some things to work on in relation to this issue personally. I also have a better understanding of some situations and can clearly identify the controlling aspects that most cause me to avoid working with these leaders.