Tales from the Geriatric Ward: Thermostat Troubles

On Saturday night, I was pretty dead to the world. I had just driven home from the NATS regional competition in Bowling Green, Kentucky and desperately needed some sleep. I watched a little television while crawling in bed. As I began to doze, I found myself getting choked and sweating. Perfect, I'm getting sick! Then I realize that the air coming from the vent in my room is warm and not cutting off. In the Geriatric Ward, one always has to think outside the box and expect insanity!

 

I stumble into the dining room -- nearly falling through the rotting floor, but that's ANOTHER story from the GW. I grope about for the light switch, allow my eyes to adjust to the brightness, and begin to investigate the thermostat. The "fool proof" system is in hold mode....a common method of controling the thermostat favored by the Chief of the Crazies residing in the Geriatric Ward. The temperature is set at 79; the control switch is under the word "heat." OH MY GOD! THE CHIEF CRAZY HAS OFFICIALLY GONE CRA-CRA!!!! It's a lovely 61 degrees outside and the heat is blowing full blast in an effort to raise the interior temperature 18 degrees in early April! OH MY GOD!

 

Bleary-eyed, I attempt to lower the temperature on the console, but the heat will not kick off! Panic is starting to set in as I convince myself that the Chief of the Crazies has broken the thermostat and simply gone into his lair thinking no one will be the wiser! Now I'm frantically pushing buttons, moving switches from "heat" to "cool" to "off" in an effort to get the insanity to stop. After all, I just want to go to sleep! (When Kennith doesn't sleep, it's not a happy time to be around him!) I consider ripping the blasted control off the wall when the fan finally stops! I am so relieved that I am going to get to sleep after all. That's when I remember that the door to my tiny bedroom has been closed tight during this 20 minute ordeal. (Lest you think I'm exaggerating on the length of time.....I promise you, it's true!)

 

I walk into the rear sauna bedroom and accept the fact that I am going to lose a few pounds while I sleep lie on top of my sheets for a few hours. That's when I have the BRILLIANT idea to turn on the ceiling fan to cool things off a bit. Did you know that my hometown is also home to a rice mill that's located just a few hundred feet from our house? Dust is a constant resident in the Geriatric Ward. Now that we have central air, we rarely run the ceiling fans and they are a perfect landing spot for lots of those dust particles. The good news? It was late at night, so I didn't see the snow-like blanket covering the foot of my bed until the next morning. The bad news? The snowy mess was probably significantly smaller than it could have been since my sneezes throughout Sunday morning and afternoon suggest that I inhaled a large amount of the moving dust. Now I find myself wondering if the Geriatric patients' craziness is contagious. I fear that I may have been infected!

 

Ah well....it's just another adventure in the Geriatric Ward.

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