Monday, February 4, 2013

When It Seems Like No One Understands....

When was the last time you looked at your life and felt that no one truly understood your situation? There was a desperate desire to share your feelings with someone, but no one came to mind. No one can fix the problem. You really don't want to burden anyone with your problems since it's certain that they are also facing problems of their own.

Yesterday I began a new series with my Sunday school class on the topic of prayer. I've never felt as though prayer was a great strength in my life. I always feel awkward when I pray -- searching for the right words to express my feelings. Honestly, at times I have felt guilty sharing my problems with God since He has so many things to deal with.....and my problems are so minute and insignificant in the grand scheme of things. I found great encouragement through my own study of 1 Samuel chapter 1 and wanted to share some of it with you.

Hannah was a woman who was greatly loved by her husband. Still, there was something missing from her life because she was unable to bear children. Her husband's other wife was a baby-making machine and constantly reminded Hannah of the difference between them. Notice the pain that the New International Version records in this passage:
And because the Lord had closed her womb, her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her.  This went on year after year.  Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the Lord, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat.  (1 Samuel 1:6-7, NIV)
As though things are not bad enough because of her rival wife, Hannah's husband can't understand why she is so upset. He even adds insult to injury when he asks Hannah "Don't I mean more to you than ten sons?"  (v. 8) I'm sure Hannah found herself somewhere between a tremendous eye roll and full blast waterworks in that moment!

Since no one at home seems to be understanding her pain, Hannah turns to the church and goes to pray. While she is pouring out her pain to God in prayer, Eli (the High Priest) observes her and thinks she's drunk! What makes Eli think this? He sees her mouth moving, but there is no sound coming out.

As I studied Hannah's prayer, I was shocked at how REAL she was with God.  She didn't hold back anything from Him at all. Take a look at this prayer found in verse 11:
O LORD Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant's misery and remember me [in other words, don't forget about my pain any longer!], and not forget your servant but give her a son....(1 Samuel 1:11, NIV. Emphasis added)
I can just hear Hannah's anger mixed with her absolute despair. In that moment, Hannah seems to have thought that even God had forgotten her. She's not even sure that God will notice her suffering.  Don't miss the fourth word of the verse:  "if"!  I don't know about you, but I've certainly been in that place.  "God, everyone else around me has let me down and I'm not even really sure that YOU are listening or even care.....but just in case You do.....please see my pain and move on my behalf." I have shared Hannah's desperation for a move of God in my life more often than I care to remember.

Poor Hannah just cannot catch a break. She's been harassed by her rival wife. Her husband knows that her childlessness is a sensitive subject and still comes across like a total lug. When she seeks refuge in the church, the minister accuses her of inappropriate behavior and tells her to get out (see v. 14). How wonderful, though, that despite the fact that no other human seemed to understand her pain, Hannah had a Heavenly Father who saw her anguish, listened to her hurt over all of the betrayal, and came to her rescue with healing and love! Scripture doesn't tell us exactly what happened in Hannah's spirit after that time of prayer in the temple, but we know that SOMETHING wonderful happened.  Notice the end of verse 18:  "Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast."  Although Hannah's situation hadn't changed, she had an assurance that her God had heard her cry for mercy and was able to act on her behalf.

The next morning, the family returns home. Hannah has to face the very ones who have caused her so much suffering again. She returns to the bed that was a constant reminder of her own failure. We don't know how much time passes between their return home at the beginning of verse 19 and the end of the verse that shares with us that "the LORD remembered Hannah." Even if it was that same night that Hannah conceived, it would have taken several weeks....and possibly several months......before Hannah would have known deep within her that God had heard and answered her prayer!

I rejoice with Hannah at the birth of Samuel, whose name means "I asked the LORD for him." Her sorrow has totally been turned into joy.  All of the weeping is now replaced with the laughter that a child brings. Hannah knew that her God had heard....and acted! The painful memories of feeling forgotten were now just a thing of the past.

Take heart from the story of Hannah. Despite your circumstances, you are not forgotten. Your Heavenly Father cares about what concerns you and welcomes your expressions of frustration, pain, and hurt. When we finally open these hurts to His healing touch do we allow Him to bring beauty into our lives again.  Take comfort in the truth that He hears......He cares.....and He understands whatever is upsetting you today.

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